Food Allergy

Last Sunday I was snacking on a pecan sticky bun and Calli was in my lap begging for a bite. I gave her a piece and as she ran back to play with her toys I turned to my computer to continue writing my paper. I could hear her in the other room gagging a little and I could tell something was wrong. I scooped her up and brought her upstairs to my husband. When we got there she vomited. We cleaned her up gave her some Benadryl and tried to get on with our day. A few minutes later she threw up again. Worrisome but nothing else was happening. I called the doctors office anyway to ask if they thought I should be worried. They wanted to see her. Turns out that vomiting is a symptom of anaphylaxis. Calli has vomited before from granola and has gotten hives from an everything cookie as well as some other stuff. The doctor felt that we were out of the woods on Sunday but wanted us to see an allergist to see what was up.
Tuesday morning we visited an allergist and finally got tested. They rubbed some nut essence into Calli's arms as well as dog essence and eggs. Turns out that Calli is allergic to tree nuts, dogs and eggs (Although she can eat baked goods with eggs in them). The test itself was not that bad; the hard part was keeping Calli from scratching her arms for the 15 minute duration.
Yes, you heard me...nuts. We are now a nut free family... but not peanuts. Yup. Cuh-razy!
I am having a hard time processing all of this. I am hyper aware of everything she puts in her mouth. Every time she coughs I am checking to see if her lips are swelling. I am already anticipating using the epi-pen. I know that this is pretty common these days and much more do-able than it used to be... I am still FUH-REAKING out.
I dreamed last night that I had to give a speech about food allergies...
I know that this is normal given the gravity and newness of the news... however.

Anyone out there have any experience?

xo
S

Speaking of videos...

This is Calli singing Happy Birthday... you can't see much but you can hear her.

Enjoy!!
xoxo
S

Holiday magic... update

I am in need of some serious holiday magic. I am on the lookout and will jam pack my days/nights and everything in between with some serious injections of everything HOLIDAYS. I already started listening to a holiday station on Pandora and I started watching a holiday movie with Calli today. (Not sure if she noticed... but I LOVED it.)  I am already planning some Santa visits and it is very likely that the holiday dish towels will come out soon... we are still using the Halloween ones! Next on the list is a holiday inspired drink at Starbucks and I will don my Santa socks. Watch out holiday season, HERE I COME!
xo
S

A good friend found this video of me (wink wink)... nailing the holidays all over the place.

Away...

Right now I am away.
I am at a conference in Boston.
Away from my family.
Away from my beautiful girl.
Away from the office.
I am sad and missing everything and everyone.
But.... I am also having a good time.
I am learning and networking and eating out without a high chair.

Also... kinda feeling guilty.

Ciao
xo

18 months

Saturday marked 18 months for Calli girl! She is just so much fun! She understands so much and is so quick to pick stuff up. We are going to the doctor on Friday for her checkup, so I will update with stats then. In the meantime here are some fun videos I took last week.

October is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month

I was scrolling through Facebook during my lunch hour, eating my salad, none the wiser and then a Huffington Post Article caught my eye. I clicked on it and read it and started to cry.
I didn't know that this month was so significant. And I didn't know that today is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day.
This article is really well written and I agree with a lot of it. I will talk about Luciana and but don't be surprised if I cry or if at times I won't talk about it. There are moments every day that I think about her and what it would be like to have two daughters. I don't know that I will ever forget. I don't know that I will ever stop grieving.
I write this all to give you some insight into dealing with someone who has dealt with or is dealing with loss. First; every person is different so don't think that because your aunt/cousin/sister-in-law or whomever went through this and dealt with it their way that everyone is the same. Second, try not to tell the story of your loss or your sister's/ cousin's/ aunt's or whomever loss until that person is ready. They may not ever be ready or they might want to sign up for a support group on day one. Listening is important.
The hardest part right now is that I want so much to enjoy and be present in every moment with my beautiful daughter but sometimes I get caught up in grief and I feel guilty. I shouldn't think about what could have been when I have been so incredibly blessed. But I also know that this is my story and someday I will get to tell Calliope about her sister angel that watches over us all.
Sending love and hugs out to you all.

Oh no...

So we were playing outside the other day and Calli decided to pour out an almost full bottle of bubbles. I missed her yelling "OH NO" by mere moments.