Facebook

I am having such a problem with Facebook lately... I love to see what people are up to and watch their children grow and hear about all the good stuff that is happening. What I hate are the ads and sponsored posts and whatnot. I also feel like every time I post something I think so much about what people are thinking about me and judging me based on my posts... It really irritates me that I put so much thought into it.
This past weekend my family and I were on a mini vacation and having some much needed time away to unwind and spend some time together and with good friends. Friday also happened to be the anniversary of my first daughter, Luciana's demise. We took a few minutes to remember and mourn and then we continued our vacation. I bought a necklace that made me think of her.
I wanted to post about it and started to a few times and then didn't. I struggled with what people would think and what I would say in between my posts of enjoyment. Let's face it, I was struggling with the memory too. I've been thinking about it for days now and I really can't figure it out. I'm glad that I didn't post a thing.
That day will forever be etched in my memory as the saddest day ever. Thank you for thinking of me.

xo
S

Summer time

Oh what fun! Although I am still working full time and taking a class (that ends in a week or so) we are trying to maximize the summer nights and weekends as much as possible. We try to take a walk every night after dinner and spend every weekend doing something fun. Splash pads and visiting with friends, visiting the town carnival, taking a dip in the pool, ice cream for lunch and dinner, shorts and sandals and smelling like sunscreen... I hope summer never ends.
Calli has been staying home with Daddy and it is so cool to see their relationship grow. I was so excited about this but it has been harder than  I expected! I AM JEALOUS! I WANT TO
We also had our one year/family photo shoot with the very talented Leah Martin. She was amazing! I have known her a super long time so we all felt at ease and she was quick to figure out what would work best for us. See some pics below! Call her if you are thinking of doing this! I highly recommend!!!

I am holding off on 15 month stats because our appointment is scheduled for 16 months for some reason... stay tuned.

NUMBERS

I constantly feel like I'm playing a game of numbers everywhere I go...
Age, weight, salary, calories, miles, sizes, prices, number of babies, how many semesters left... It is a lot to think about and a lot of try to navigate. I am 37 years old, I can see 40 and am starting to think about what I want to be when I am 40 and what I need to do to get there. It's a lot of work but it needs to be done. Boring right? More like scary!!!
Some of the questions I am pondering are "do we want to have another baby?", "Is this degree really worth all of this time away from my family?", "What is my three year plan?", "how do I get a three year plan?", "why do I eat better and work out and don't lose a pound?", "How much salary is enough? and how do I get there and still have some flexibility?"...
These are truly the things that keep me up at night. I'm not writing them here for answers necessarily; more to write them out and let them out into the universe and see what happens. I am a true believer that things happen when they are supposed to and that answers bubble up when you least expect it. I am writing this to say "OK UNIVERSE! I'M READY FOR SOME ANSWERS!!"
I also think that women go through a lot of the same things at the same time and don't talk about it and therefore don't have anyone to to go through it with. Yes of course my husband and I talk about all of this and more but sometimes it is nice to get a woman's perspective, especially someone who may be pondering the same questions at 3am.
I had my first meeting with a member of my personal board of directors, to talk about these very things. She was great and was able to give me some ideas on how to get started on this three year plan. I'll keep you posted!
Ciao
S

Random

• As I was driving to work this morning my coffee cup slipped and spilled coffee on my pants and shirt and I didn't have a tissue nearby to sop it up. Great way to start the day.
• Last night baby girl was sleeping and hubby was working late... as I was walking through the house locking up and dodging toys and whatnot I was smiling so huge I could barely stand it. 
• Hubby and I usually take a week long vacation. The past couple of summers we didn't plan one but ended up on vacation anyway... This year it just isn't in the cards for us. We had to fix our roof and the car has been in the shop more than in the driveway and we just can't swing it and IT IS SO FREAKING SAD! I'm trying really hard to plan some little trips here and there but it isn't the same. AND everything is so expensive. ugh. 
• Hubby has officially started daddy daycare and I LOVE and HATE it at the same time. I love it because I am super excited about the fact that baby girl and hubby get to spend all this time together. I hate it because I cannot be there too!!! I also am trying really hard not to tell him what to do with their time. This is the HARDEST part.
• I had the house professionally cleaned about a month ago. It started because my best friend had her house cleaned and organized in anticipation of her second child. I had been thinking about it for a while because it was becoming overwhelming... the dust bunnies were about to ban together and strike about the working conditions being so bad. I swear it was that bad and I couldn't even think where to begin. It was a little pricier than I was expecting (listen to me whine two bullets ago about expenses... this was before the car decided to move in with the mechanic!!) but totally worth it. She came over to assess the damage and talk about what needed to be done, that prompted me to spend most of Sunday cleaning up the clutter and clearing the way for her to do the deep cleaning that the house needed. It was SO AMAZING to come home to a clean house! I wish we could afford it more often. But it has helped me to keep up with it a little better. 
• For the first time in my adult life I bought a pair of white jeans!! AND I wore them and didn't get a thing on them! For me, this is quite an accomplishment.
• Full disclosure... book club is at my house tomorrow night and I haven't even LOOKED at the book much less opened or read a word of it! FAIL!
 

See you some other random time! 

 

 

14 months

For the record I have started a few posts and just never got around to posting. Yes, it has been a whole month since I last posted. Little lady is 14 months today! 
She is precocious and amazing and really starting to communicate. She lets you know what is up! The pictures tell the whole story. Enjoy!!

13 months

I can't believe I let this one slip by. My beautiful girl is 13 months. She weighs about 22 pounds, walks everywhere and is the BIGGEST goof ball EVER. She likes to laugh, pretend she is talking on the phone and lately she puts a kitchen towel over her head and tries to walk around. I don't love that one but she thinks it's hilarious.
She is breaking four molars at once so there are a lot of whiny moments and lots of needing to be held. I hate that she is in pain and I want to hold her whenever she wants me to because I want her to feel better. When I do finally put her down she instantly falls to the ground with wails and sobs; DRAMA! It doesn't generally last long, especially when she realizes that it isn't getting her anywhere. She knows and says more words everyday. She loves to point out dogs and her nose and we've spent a lot of time talking about what sounds animals make; she tries to mimic me and she does pretty good.
The weather is finally getting better so we can walk after dinner and take trips to the park for turns on the swing.
We are having fun!
On Saturday I finally brought her into the pool with me at the gym. She LOVED it. She was a little weary at first but warmed up quickly. The hardest part was getting us both showered and dressed. I'm sure that will get easier with practice.

xo
S&C
(I wrote this a few days ago and have been waiting to put a pic with it... might as well wait forever!)

Mother's Day

What a great day! At the very beginning of the day I got a gift that I didn't ask for and didn't even know I wanted or needed.... we slept until 8am! What a difference those last few hours make. I had to get up at 5:30 to feed Calli but she fell back asleep right away and cuddled with me until 8. Loved it.
Hubby and baby girl took me out to eat at our fave neighborhood spot and then we went to the park for swings, slides and a peek at the waterfall.
I also got to spend some time with my own wonderful mother for some retail therapy and a quick dinner with my sister and her family.
What more could a gal ask for... oh yeah... flowers, chocolate and a special steak dinner! Yup. On top of all that it was the first GORGEOUS day of the year. Wonderful.